Leaning On A Floodlight Pylon...

Can you play the ukulele?

According to 'experts' on the internet, learning to play the ukulele is as easy as pie. Then they proceed to run through the chords and strumming actions required to produce something resembling a tune. The problem is, they've no doubt had tons of spare time to practice, practice, practice.

When I was a young boy, one of my relatives bought me a ukulele for Christmas. Never having heard of a ukulele before, I naturally thought it was a guitar for a little boy and I fitted that bill precisely. It was only when I heard my parents talking about the uke that I realised it had to be a different musical instrument to a guitar. I couldn't get a decent tune out of it, though, as it emitted a noise that definitely got on my family's nerves!

I don't know whatever happened to that ukulele. I think maybe that it may have got 'accidentally' trodden or stamped on by one of my brothers. It wasn't an instrument that I associated too much with in any case. Perhaps my brother did everybody a favour.

Fast forward more than half a century and I am now the proud owner of a proper posh ukulele. And I have a carry bag and a shoulder strap for it. But, can I play it? Well, just a little, but as a full-time carer I can't find the time to practice like the online professionals can. Let's just say I have learnt to play a couple of notes but, I'm getting there, slowly.

So, what has my owning a uke got to do with Cray Wanderers? Absolutely nothing, on the face of it, except that I'd like to be able to fluently play just one song all the way through, just to prove to myself I can play my first musical instrument since mastering the recorder at junior school. And the tune that I have targeted on my radar to learn on my uke is 'The Happy Wanderer', hence the tenuous link to our club. What's that you say? You've never heard of 'The Happy Wanderer'? There's plenty of versions of the song on YouTube; just make sure you find the one where the chorus starts, "valderee, valdera". 

Apparently that was the tune Cray Wanderers adopted in the early 1950s Grassmeade days, as I was advised by the late former club stalwart Arthur Nichols many years ago. I never had any reason to doubt him.

Who knows? Maybe I'll be good enough to perform on the stage in the clubhouse at the Clock End of Flamingo Park one day — just don't hold your breath waiting for it to happen, though.